The past two weeks have been very hard. I keep expecting to wake up feeling better one day, but I don’t. There is a heavy sadness that hangs over me and weighs down my days. Grief hits me in repeated waves throughout my day. Pretty much everything in my house is a trigger. I miss my boy.
The foster dogs are keeping me busy and preventing me from hiding in my room with my grief, but I wish they would find their homes. I worry they can sense that my love right now is hollow. I am operating by rote.
Desperately searching for answers or any form of peace, I have been reading and researching. I need to learn from this, grow from this, harvest something good, something that will finally propel me forward again. So I read and take notes and I cry and I search for an answer that my soul realizes does not exist.
I’ve found a degree of comfort in the incredible outpouring of love and support I have received from my dog-hearted community. I apologize for not always responding, but please know that you are holding me afloat.
Behavioral Euthanasia is a term I scarcely knew but now consumes my days. Sharing my pain and unrelenting grief with others who have experienced it has helped and at the same time saddened me. I had no idea. And I wish I still didn’t.
I miss my boy.
In all my reading and researching, though, I am learning a lot. One thing I’ve learned and need to be VERY CLEAR with all of you about is that Frankie did not do this because he was a ‘pit bull.’
If you’d like to read an excellent book that separates the fact and science from the myth and hype, consider reading Pit Bull: The Battle over an American Icon by Bronwen Dickey. It’s extensive and well-written, but most importantly it is well-researched and fair, digging through all the history and science and stories to uncover the truth about this remarkable and misunderstood breed(s).
Frankie was a near-purebred American Staffordshire Terrier, according to a DNA analysis. Amstaffs fall under the umbrella of ‘pit bulls’. Reading about Amstaffs has been enlightening. I have always just loved my dog, not really caring what his breeding was.
And now having done hours and hours of research, I realize that Frankie did not attack my daughter or any of the others he threatened because he was an Amstaff, he did it in spite of his breed.
According to all that I’ve read about Amstaffs they make horrible guard dogs because they love people so much. In fact, unless it’s another dog breaking into your house, there is much more danger of being licked to death than bitten.
Any reader of this blog knows that Frankie loved every foster dog and puppy he ever encountered. He could convince any shy, scared dog to come out of its shell. He has been the best friend of so many dogs who struggled with other dogs, Gala and Gracie being two of his first converts. He was gentle with even the tiniest of puppy and patient with the most guarded of dogs. At the dog park, he made friends far and wide.
Amstaffs, by breed, many times do not do well with other dogs. So Frankie, clearly was an outlier of his breed, something was askew in his genetic makeup that enabled him to unabashedly love every dog he ever met.
People were a different story for him, again not a common characteristic of his breed. I never understood why he was so frightened of them, but I tried to reassure him and when I couldn’t, I tried to manage him.
I can’t blame his actions on how he was raised—we knew him from six weeks of age, loving him beyond reason, spending hundreds of dollars and endless hours on training, proudly watching as he passed his Canine Good Citizenship test and enjoying his latest foray into the world of agility. He was socialized with all kinds of animals, traveled with us, visited local stores and dog parks and festivals. We did everything we knew to set him up for success, to make him a good dog.
And it wasn’t enough.
I don’t doubt that we made the right decision, but I want to be very clear about this.
Pit bulls are great dogs. They are great pets. They are the best of friends.
I want to be sure I am not adding to the misinformation and hype.
In my shock and sadness, I shared with you what one behaviorist said. A behaviorist who had never met my dog or me but was only going on her experience. Frankie’s actions would have condemned any dog, of any breed. And now having talked to so many others who have also had to experience behavioral euthanasia, I know it can and does happen with any breed.
I love pit bulls. They are the most remarkable breed – smart and happy, so darn willing to please with goofy, fun, effervescent personalities. And oh my gosh, the love of a pit bull—there is nothing like it. It is vast and pure and unrelenting.
So, when my heart feels strong enough, when it is ready again, you can bet that my next dog will once again be a pit bull.
Cause that dog-shaped hole in my heart? It has a wide forehead and a strong, muscular build, tiny little ears, and a goofy smile that never stops.
Thanks for reading!
If you’d like to know more about my blogs and books, visit CaraWrites.com or subscribe to my occasional e-newsletter.
If you’d like to know more about the book, Another Good Dog: One Family and Fifty Foster Dogs, visit AnotherGoodDog.org, where you can find more pictures of the dogs from the book (and some of their happily-ever-after stories), information on fostering, and what you can do right now to help shelter animals! You can also purchase a signed copy or several other items whose profits benefit shelter dogs!
If you’d like to know how you can volunteer, foster, adopt or donate with OPH, click here. And if you’d like more pictures and videos of my foster dogs past and present, be sure to join the Another Good Dog Facebook group.
I love hearing from readers, so please feel free to comment here on the blog, email carasueachterberg@gmail.com or connect with me on Facebook, twitter, or Instagram.
Best,
Cara
Released August 2018 from Pegasus Books and available now:
Another Good Dog™ 
❤
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Interesting post. Does your daughter know that you’d like to get another pitbull again? If so, how does she feel about it? I remember you saying how forgiving (a little too forgiving in your mind) after Frankie’s attack on her. I wonder what subconsciously set him off. From what I’ve read about your time with him, in my book, you did everything a good dog owner should do, starting from the beginning. I didn’t realize that Frankie was so young when you got him. Keep working to learn more. You’re doing a good thing.
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Addie loves pitbulls – always has, still does. I don’t know why Frankie did what he did but I honestly believe it had nothing to do with his breed, but plenty to do with his breeding. Something was not wired right in his brain. I will forever question if there was something we could have done differently to have kept it in check, but I know he is at peace now and someday I will be too.
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You did what you thought you could do for him at the time. While no pitbull will ever replace him, I hope that you’ll be able to help other ones in the future and have a positive outcome. I’m glad that your family continues to remain dog lovers despite all the mishaps they’ve had with man’s best friend. Keep blogging.
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My heart bled for you and the ordeal. Rest assured you made the only decision you could make. I hold my rescues a little closer and play that they feel the love.
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Thanks Bernie – and thanks for choosing to rescue!
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I know how very hard this was for you. For me it was a cat. Mazel was a hissy kitten and turned into what I called “psycho kitty”. He could be sweet and loving one minute and then very aggressive and bite. I also had gotten another very sweet cat to keep him company. One time the “psycho” had me cornered, hissing and spitting at me. After he bit a neighbor who was watching them for me and she developed cellulitis, I decided to have him euthanized. We were at the vets and I couldn’t do it. I even considered having his teeth pulled. Years later when the cats were 13, the good cat had cancer and needed to be euthanized. I decided at that point to have them both euthanized. The vet was wonderful and said that you shouldn’t have to have a pet that you are afraid of. It did help to hear that. It is a terrible decision to have to make, but you made the right one.
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Thanks Susan. My most serious bite ever was also from a cat – incredibly painful, down to the bone and I still have the scars. I’m still a little leery of strange cats. I’m sorry you had to go through that – it is tough, so I understand your hesitation the first time. He was a lucky cat to have you.
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Cara, My heart goes out to you. I owned a rescue German Shepherd who was deathly afraid of her own shadow. Even the Director at the SPCA advised me to euthanize to give her peace. I could not do it so instead, we found a wonderful vet who would make house calls, yes it was expensive but worth it, and he found a great combination of medication to mellow my big girl so that she would not hurt anyone when her anxieties flared up during thunderstorms and fireworks to name a few! She lived to be 12 years old under medication and within the confines of our home, never going outside except to do her business and then pulling to get back into the safety of her house! She developed a tooth abscess and our vet was unable to operate on her in our home of course and so the only course of action was to euthanize. We all agree, she could not ride in a car to get there, she could not be around other animals and it would be cruel for her to wake up after anesthesia in a strange place. We agreed that we gave her the best life we could for as long as we could given her abuse as a puppy. It was hard on both my husband and me.
I am a bereavement therapist and nothing i did made the pain go away for either of us or our children. One way in which i knew i was healed was to break the cycle of purchasing a dog from a puppy mill, which she was. I tell people to rescue or at the very least, scrutinize your breeder. I now have a wonderful yellow lab that is my therapy dog and she came from a wonderful breeder who we ran through the wringer!!!! The breeder welcomed our checking her out so thoroughly and did us as well. I find that when dealing with the pain of pet loss, the best and only way through it is to dive head first into another dog, which you are doing. It does not ease the pain at first, nothing does, but it helps as a distraction. Eventually your heart will wrap itself up in another dog that deserves that love and so desperately needs it! Until then, be kind to yourself and know that Frankie was here for a short time because he brought lessons your soul and others needed to learn. I know because I lost my son shortly before his birth. His lifetime was a very short window but it changes people daily as I am the founder of Olivia’s House, a Grief and Loss Center for Children in York. He walks with me every day in spirit and helps me to help others, especially children, deal with the pain of grief.
Hugs,
Leslie Delp, MA
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Thanks for sharing your story. I imagine caring for your shepherd was much like the ‘frog in the kettle’, adapting your life slowly to accommodate hers. I do believe that Frankie was placed in my life for a reason and I will always be looking for that reason and using his life and love to propel me forward and help other dogs. I’ve heard so much good about Olivia’s House and am grateful for your much-needed ministry there. It’s inspiring to hear your story and the positive power you’ve found in grief.
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For me it was a sheltie who was easily the most beautiful dog I ever met to look at but she was crazy from the beginning. I could not accept she had a behavioural problem that couldn’t be fixed until she attacked me one day. So yes, I agree it can happen to any breed of dog. However, my sheltie weighed only 28 pounds and she had a small mouth so the damage she did was limited and even though I still have scars, it was relatively minor damage. When it happens in a pitbull, people get badly damaged and even killed. I personally have three friends who were involved in rescue of pitbulls and who had experiences like yours and no longer try to rescue pitbulls. And that part, large size and a lot of damage potential, IS the breed. I also had my own dog get attacked by two pitbulls a few months ago. A family member recently adopted a pitbull cross rescue imported from the USA. My dog and I will not be visiting them.
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That is sad, but I suppose understandable. I was leaning that way until I read the research and now I understand that we tend to report the bites from bully breeds and not the others. Fear sells. German Shepherds, Rottweilers, and Dobermans have also had their time in the spotlight, so I hope that our obsession with pits will pass too. I know too many amazing pitbulls to give up on this breed. You have to do what you are most comfortable with, though, as I’m sure you know, animals sense and respond to human fear.
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You’re right. I am afraid of pitbulls now. I wasn’t before. Two of my friends in the south where I spend my winters have rescue pitbulls and love them dearly. I adored their dogs. I was not a fan of breed bans or banning pitbulls as a breed. I would have even considered adopting one except for the local breed bans in my hometown. My dog ran and played with daily while we were in the south from when she was a small pup until the day of the attack. They had been playing together almost every day for over two months. They were all playing together so nicely that day. The only difference on the attack day was we had a teenager with us who was throwing a ball. The two pitbulls were not interested in chasing the ball. My girl was. She loves chasing the ball. The teenager was putting the ball in the thrower and she was watching him and ignoring the other two dogs instead of joining their usual rowdy play. The first pitbull suddenly turned in a flash from sweet and wonderful to charging full speed from 20 yards away and tried to lock on my girl’s face. The dog grabbed and tore open my dog’s tongue instead. The second pitbull then came in on the other side and tried to grab my dog’s rear flank, puncturing and tearing but mostly getting a mouthful of fur. My girl leaped straight up and spun above while both dogs were after her. She moved so fast spinning and leaping up that they didn’t get a good grip one her. The dog screams were awful and she was spinning with splashes of blood flying everywhere. Other dog owners grabbed their dogs and ran. The owner grabbed the one who went for my dog’s face and then it was one on one with my dog and the second pitbull. Misty is a big German Shepherd/Golden Retriever cross and she knocked the second dog over and pinned her by the throat and her body weight. She did not bite back even though she was bleeding everywhere from her mouth. She simply pinned and held the second pitbull down. The first pitbull broke free from the owner and attacked the second pitbull’s face while she was down on the ground. I grabbed my girl and pulled her off and we left the scene immediately while the two pitbulls tore at each other. We were lucky that day. It took a full three weeks of careful introductions and lots of gentleness with other experienced dog owners before my dog got over it and stopped acting terrified of other dogs. She was also terrified of small children after the attack and was shying and barking at them. I was worried I would have to put her down because she couldn’t be trusted around children as she was so afraid of them. We did a lot of work with a good trainer who had dog savvy kids. My girl now acts like she’s forgotten it all and plays nicely with other dogs and doesn’t act funny around children. She came back to herself and the sweet dog she was before the attack. I myself will never ever get over that attack. One second friendly best buddies playing happily, the next blood everywhere. I am now afraid of pitbulls and, as you pointed out, I’m sure my Misty would pick up on that if I were around one. I do think you did the right thing for your beloved boy. I am very sorry, deeply sorry, that you had this horrible loss and I feel so much for your pain. I admire all the great work you do as a fosterer. I only wish you well.
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I thought of you earlier this week, a girl I went to high school with was seriously injured by her dog (who appears to be a pit mix) that she loved very much. They were laying on the couch together, she kissed her dog on the head which startled him. He bit her bottom lip off, and they were unable to reattach it. She already had 1 facial surgery and 100 stitches in her mouth, and will need additional surgeries in the future. Apparently this is not the first incident. Though I know you are heartbroken, I hope you know you did the right thing before something even more tragic happened to one of your family members.
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That’s awful. Poor woman. I helped write and teach a curriculum that teaches kids how to safely interact with dogs and one of the things we say is never put your face in a dog’s face. We also say never go near a dog that is sleeping, eating, or playing with a toy. Addie said to me shortly after we had Frankie euthanized that maybe by going through this, she had saved another person from something much worse. I do believe that. Prayers for your friend.
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We put Bubba down after fostering him 9 months due to unpredictable aggression. He was a yellow lab, not a bit of pit in him. It can happen to anyone. This was two years ago and there is still a hole in my heart from it but we did what was best for him. He was terrified of everything and couldn’t seem to get a grasp on reality. Medications just didn’t work for him.
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I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I think we will carry these wounded souls on our hearts forever.
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Oh Cara, thank you for writing through your pain and sorrow, and for standing up for pibbles. I truly believe that what was wired wrong with Frankie couldn’t have been trained or loved away. Your family gave him the best life ever, but it couldn’t overcome whatever was in him. Ironically, he may have given many of your foster dogs their best start in their new lives. Maybe that is one of his legacies. But, please, take it into your heart that you couldn’t have done any more for him.
Give yourself permission to take a break from fostering. Do not, especially at this time, burn yourself out. When the puppies go, see if a friend can take Daisy for a week, or even a couple of days, and someone else can take Flannery Give you and yours space.
Big hugs and glasses of wine to all of you.
For those who think that pit bulls are more dangerous than other dogs, remember that a husky mauled a little boy in Utah in March, a Labrador attacked a boy in Australia in April, and so on. ANY dog can be dangerous, although most dogs are not.
And a lot of dogs are misidentified as pits. Take the ‘Find the Pit Bull’ test. https://www.shawpitbullrescue.com/can-you-find-the-pit-bull/ and read through this study which analyzes how often shelter personnel misidentifies intakes: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S109002331500310X
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Thank you for posting this information. Good stuff. We need to separate the fact from the fiction. Too much disservice has been done to too many dogs.
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Since I never have had an aggressive four-legged companion, I cannot say I know exactly what you’re going through. But eight years ago I felt I had to euthanize one of my cats because of a medical condition, albeit not a terminal one (e.g., cancer). A few years earlier, she had had surgery to try to correct a condition known as megacolon, in which the colon becomes so large that fecal matter collects into an impacted mass near the rectum, makes it very difficult, extremely painful and sometime impossible to defecate. (And no, laxatives or enemas did not help because it becomes so impacted and hard because the colon, doing its thing, removes the water from it.) Although the surgery appeared to correct it, for some reason, the megacolon returned a couple years later. And even though the vet who performed the (home) euthanasia told me she thought I was doing the right thing, it was — and remains — the only time in my life when I’ve had an animal euthanized when s/he didn’t have a life-threatening condition (or had never bitten anyone). I will, I think, forever be haunted by the memory of Marlee walking back and forth next to me, rubbing her nose against me, and purring loudly like it was an ordinary day, unaware of what was about to happen. For years I felt like I had betrayed her and her love, that I did it because it would make things more convenient for me. She wasn’t about to die, after all. Megacolon is not fatal and she wasn’t always in pain, although we were out of realistic treatments. But I decided that if I were her, would I want a life like that, always fearing intense, unbearable pain every time I had to go to the bathroom? It was the hardest decision I’ve even had to make. (I’m sorry is this was too graphic or otherwise TMI.)
In any case, although I have never experienced having to make a decision about (and cope with) a behavioral euthanasia, I do know what it’s like to euthanize an otherwise healthy companion. It’s so very, very hard and I can truly empathize. But we all make the best decisions we can with the information we have at the time. It’s easy to second-guess oneself, and I’m glad you don’t seem to be doing that, Cara.
Hang in there. As you know, healing takes time, grief has no timeline, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Your way is the right way for you.
You and your family remain in my thoughts. Take good care of each other.
Steve
(I apologize this is so long.)
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Thanks Steve – what a tragic story. Hearing what others have gone through does help. Animals have the capacity to truly break our hearts but I suppose it is the price we must pay for the privilege of loving them.
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You’re right, it can happen with any breed and it is usually the result of being born with something not just right. When we had to put our Daisy down (whom we adopted at 7 weeks and did everything we possibly could to raise her right) for uncontrollable, unpredictable aggression, the behaviorist told us that some dogs are born with mental illnesses, just like some people. But since the dogs can’t tell us what their symptoms are it’s impossible to treat them successfully.
I know that you are still hurting, and I know that the pain will last for a long time. But I’m glad you are researching this and realize you are not the only one who has been in this awful situation, as that does help with the guilt that inevitably comes with this kind of decision. We KNOW we did the right thing, but there’s still that little voice that says, “maybe if I just did this or that…” When the truth is, there was nothing we could have done to make a difference.
Thank you for sharing your experience, as that will help others as well. As you say, support is essential when dealing with this kind of grief, and I’m glad you are getting it!
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I do believe that to be true – that dogs suffer from mental illness just like people. I’m certain that was what was at play here. Frankie was such a lover, but the demons we couldn’t see won in the end. Once again, I wish so desperately they could talk. I think the doubt and what-ifs and guilt will follow me through life, but hopefully the love will always be stronger. Thanks for your good words.
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The love will be stronger, Cara…and in the long run, it is what you will remember. Trust me on that.
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I lived next door to a Staffordshire terrier for years. His name was Percy and his owner had had a stroke. Percy was friendly and happy and always there for his owners. He never threatened anyone and was always happy to see me when I came to the door. He wouldn’t have hurt a fly. I had cats that went outside and Percy never threatened them. I am sorry for your situation and I completely understand your decision and your grief. Your joy will come back, I am sure of that but in the meantime know you are surrounded by good thoughts and support from people who admire and respect what you are doing.
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Thank you Noreen. I so desperately need to hear stories like this right now. My story seems to encourage more people to tell their nightmare and my soul desperately wants to hear the good stories – they are the ones that make me feel that joy will be possible again someday.
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I’m so sorry what you had to go through with Frankie. You did the right thing by him; sometimes we can’t always fix what’s hurting our animals. I hope with time the hurt and guilt will ease with time and as you help more animals.
Thank you for this post as well clarifying your thoughts on pit bulls. After seeing what the behaviorist said to you, and so many commentators going on about how they were worried/concerned about pitbulls, I thought this would become another site talking about how dangerous pitbulls are to society. I used to foster for my local shelter, which got about 90% “pitbull type dogs”. Some did have to be euthanized for behavioral reasons, but the vast majority were sweet, loving family dogs. We loved fostering those big, blocky-headed goofballs, so much so that we adopted one. I don’t know what her story was before she came to us, but I do know that when we adopted her she went on to get her CGC, volunteer with kids and veterans, and put up with the endless rotation of foster dogs I brought into the house. She was a wonderful dog, regardless of being a “pitbull” (technically an AmStaff) and I miss her every day.
Anyway, I’m glad you will think about having one in your house again. They are really wonderful dogs, and don’t deserve the hype they get. Another resource I appreciate is Animal Farm Foundation (www.animalfarmfoundation.org) who works hard to help this misunderstood breed. Thanks for sharing.
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I love hearing the good stories about pitties. I’ve been reading a lot about Animal Farm Foundation and am hoping I can someday go there for a visit. I love the attitude of their founder Jane. She’s remarkable. I’m also considering volunteering with our local SPCA which is jammed with pits, just so I can be near some. My heart needs that.
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A number of years ago, a pitbull therapy dog joined my Paws to Read program. Monte was a Katrina rescue, and was so nonchalant that he was used to see if other rescues were dog-reactive. His adopters had him certified as a therapy dog, and I was lucky enough to have him along once when we went to visit the schools. He enjoyed the kids, and was so chill that his owner could let him off leash in the school library to roam and receive pets as he pleased. He could be bumped or hugged and never let it phase him.
Monte has gone to the big Treat Castle in the sky, but I think of him often. I’ve been in contact with a lot of therapy dogs, and all of them are amazing, but Monte was in a class by himself.
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Thank you for sharing this! I recently read something from the founder of Animal Farm. She said the best thing we could for pitbulls is stop talking about them. I agree with her, but since the press won’t stop, maybe we need to counter it with stories like Monte’s.
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Cara, we have been insanely busy for the past month or so and I didn’t see the post from May about Frankie until I saw this one today. Tears are streaming down my face for you my friend. Not that it matters but I completely agree with your decision, however, I cannot even begin to imagine what you are feeling inside. Luckily we have no children in the home anymore or we would have to worry about the terrier mix we got from a West VA hoarding case a few years ago. He still randomly goes after the other dogs, randomly gets aggressive, and rarely trusts my husband or any man to touch him. He has required more patience than any dog I’ve ever had, but we hang in there because he hasn’t caused any injuries. My husband and I have had some serious battles over the years because one of us has just reached our limit with his mood swings. But after a few cross words between each other (multiple times, lol), time to calm down, and peaceful conversation – we realize that for better or worse, Mr. Fred is ours, we adore him, and he completes our family. Here’s the link to his story and you can even see him in a kennel with a bandage on his leg at about the 19-20 sec mark. He was one of the few with fur left. https://www.wfxrtv.com/news/local-news/angels-of-assisi-rescues-dogs-from-neglect/642496336
Anyway, I recently had a dear friend that took her own life. It broke my heart and everyone else’s, but especially a little pit mix that she left behind. The vet thinks that she has pit bull and cattle dog in her, but no one really knows! She is our second pit mix and so far seems to have the same, sweet demeanor as our older one. Don’t get me wrong, she has several quirks and has been through difficult trauma and loss, as she was in the home with her owner for 4 days before anyone realized that something was wrong. I can’t keep her permanently, but we brought her here so we could socialize her with the rest of our motley crew, as well as, just show her ongoing love and affection. She has changed so much in the week that she has been here and every day we see a little more pep in her step and more personality shining through. I am such a fan of pits whether there’s just a little in there or a lot. So many of my friends own them and they are wonderful. Just like any breed, sometimes things just aren’t right no matter what we do.
You are such an inspiration and so dedicated – and you have been for so long. Do what you need to heal your heart and soul and know how much joy you brought to Frankie and vice versa.
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Thank you for loving the pitties. They are such a special breed and they’ve been singled out unfairly. I don’t know if I can ever adopt another dog (of any breed), but I do plan to continue to rescue in Frankie’s name. he loved every dog, regardless of breed, and I will too. Thanks for your kind words and for all you do to rescue.
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I am just crying here reading your story, next to my 3 year old AMSTAFF who is probably chasing rabbits and what not in his deep sleep. You said you wanna hear about the good….Mag is my sunshine! He is the sweetest, most loving and gentle being ever! We have 19 cats who he adores and sometimes fears (shame on you Louie!), his favorite buddy is a miniature horse on our fave trail and he cannot get enough of smelling and discovering all creatures of this beautiful planet we all call home. I have been rescuing cats for the past 18 years -50+- and I do have a fare share of stories about euthanizing them as necessary, but I will never stop helping and loving them! That’s my calling. Keep at it Cara. You seem to be an amazing person and we need more people like you! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Thank you for your kind words and for what you are doing for so many kitties. I’m being flung full-on into the cat crisis this week as we purchased a home in the mountains of VA and upon arriving to being work on it (it’s a long-neglected lob cabin) discovered the previous owner left his cat and at least three other feral cats that have become dependent on him feeding them (but not spaying or neutering them). In the time between when he left and when we arrived, they have been starving to death. I am in the process of trying to help them, but there are no real services here and I am trying to figure out what I can and can’t do to help them. Anyway, the cat crisis is real, that’s for sure, so thanks for all you do for them. Give your amstaff a big hug from me. Gosh, I miss the solid love of one.
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Wow Wow Wow!
What a timely way to catch your blog. I’m presently still grieving over the loss of my baby Bella. She was a Cavachon. Bought from a breeder out in Iowa. She arrived in Logan Airport with her brother at 10 weeks old.
That girl was connected to my leg for the next 3 1/2 years. She was 16 lbs of love. Yet so neurotic whenever guests arrived. As well as on walks growling and barking at most dogs we passed. She did have a wonder relationship with a Yorki though.
To the point thought. I received a call from my son stating Bella had escaped out of the yard and ran down the street meeting up with a passing truck.
To say I was devastated would be an understatement. That dog was extension of my love for life. My 18 year old son got lazy while watching her play in the yard. There was an area that spices and so forth grew. It was about 2 feet high. He was in having breakfast. The dog should not have been let out without supervising her.
It took me a year of severe depression to even consider another dog. Its been several years now. Eventually I rescued a stunning 3 year old German Shepherd from the ASPCS. Unfortunately after a very short period of time this beautiful beast turned on me. Apparently he had severe emotion trama that I was not made aware of upon adoption. I returned that beauty to the ASPCA.
I’ve regretted that decision but I knew in fairnest to this fur baby he deserved a professional dog therapist to continue his best life.
My hope is take another dive into the joy of ownership soon. Since a pitbull, AB, and others closely associated with this breed (s) appears to be holding my interest the most. Your story couldn’t have come at a better time.
My heart goes out to your story. I just want to reiterate others comments. Love em up! Dogs can feel your emotions. When they look at you its as if they are looking into your soul. This connection is beyond description in my experience.
Find that piece in your heart that made you so happy. Give it up to all those dogs who so desperately need you. The rewards will benefit all.
Andrew
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