Amstaff, owner responsibility, Pit bull, running with dogs

Open Letter to My Pitbull-Owning Neighbor

Monday morning Gala and I set off on a run, well, with my sore hamstring more a runnish.

IMG_3129

We’d gone about a mile and ¼ when we came to a lone farm house that sits nearly on the road. Most of the old farmhouses in Pennsylvania do, since the roads are really paved cow paths and mail routes.

A young brown dog with a friendly face lives at this house chained in the side yard on a wire that allows him to nearly meet the road. On the days when he is outside early, he charges down the hill at us until the chain hangs him and his feet are yanked into a skidding stop. He barks ferociously, but his tail is usually wagging.

One time he was loose, about a year ago, he was still mostly a puppy. It was a rare day when I was running dogless. He leapt at me, nipping at my elbows, desperately wanting attention. I tried to pet him, but he dove at my face, most likely in the hopes of licking it. I continued on and he followed for a dozen yards or so before a voice from the porch called him back.

The dog is fullgrown now. A pitbull/bulldog mix of some sort – broad and squat and muscled with an enormous head. His regular charge always makes Gala nervous and she’ll bark back at him a time or two before pulling hard to get away from the house and his noise as we run past.

Monday, I heard the dog but didn’t see him as we approached the house. Odd, I thought, since by now he would usually be halfway down the short slope after us. We were nearly to the house when he came charging across the grass; a few inches of broken chain hung from his collar. I pulled Gala to the opposite side of the road, but he ran across the road after us, lunging at her. I yelled, she returned fire and he backed off, only to come at us again and again and again.

I yelled towards the house, “Come get your dog!” I could see lights on in the house and cars in the drive, I knew they were home, but no one appeared.

I looked around for a stick or something to keep the dog away so we could go, but every time I tried to move away, he charged at us and Gala defended me. This went on for what felt like an eternity. The dog charging, me yelling, Gala barking and defending. They’d get tangled up snapping at each other for a few moments, I’d pull Gala away, but the dog would only back away and charge again.

I was screaming so loudly, my voice was growing hoarse, and still no one came out of the house which sat only twenty feet away. Finally, I yelled, “Come get your dog or I’m going to call the police!”

I had my cell phone with me, but I don’t know how I could have dialed it while trying to manage Gala who was frantic.

A moment later, an older man appeared. He looked like many of the older men I encounter in our hollow—thin, bearded, yellow teeth, wearing an old t-shirt, blue jeans, with a chain hanging from a pocket.

Over the sound of the dogs, he yelled, “He won’t hurt you!” He was kind of laughing as he said it.

I lost it.

Adrenaline, emotion, I don’t know what, but I snapped. I’ll give you the PG version as best I can remember since my mind was black at that point.

“Get your dog away from us! He shouldn’t be loose! He shouldn’t be in the road!”

He still didn’t catch his dog. The dog and Gala had stopped lunging at each other and were in a standoff.

He continued to assure me that the dog wouldn’t hurt me.

I screamed at him that he didn’t know that. I yelled that the dog was out of control and attacking my dog.

He yelled back that the dog wouldn’t hurt my dog.

I asserted again, colorfully, that he didn’t know that either.

I screamed at him to get a hold of his dog.

Finally, he caught the dog and held up the broken chain. Once again, he reminded me that his dog would never hurt me or my dog.

I told him that was clearly not the case and if the dog was loose again, I would call the dog warden. I told him that if his dog bit me, PA law says he’d have to destroy it. At which point, he told me I was saying that because I was afraid of pitbulls.

My mind exploded. I don’t remember what I yelled at him at this point. I’m sure it’s nothing I’m proud of, but I was past the point of no return. I don’t remember ever being so enraged at another person.

The man shook his head and yelled at me to go back to Baltimore (this is what all the native Pennsyltuckians say to ‘newcomers’ in our area). Then he said a few choice things about Gala.

Fury choked my words and I knew my tears weren’t far behind. I tried to yell something about not leaving his dog chained up, but we were yelling over each other at that point, neither of us caring what the other said. It occurred to me that like pretty much all my neighbors, this guy most likely had a gun. I began running. I didn’t look back.

I spent the rest of the run, trying to regain control of my emotions, trying to figure out why I had snapped so badly at this old man. Why had the entire scene rocked me so completely? It was another mile or two before I finally stopped shaking and crying and slowed to a walk.

Gala was fine. I was fine. The dog hadn’t hurt me or her, but I had screamed like a lunatic at an old man.

Why?

Maybe I went over the top because I was scared. Scared that Gala would have another misfortunate event – she seems to gather them to her like a magnet.

Maybe I overreacted because Frankie is going to grow up to look much like that dog. I love my dog beyond reason, but what will other people think when they see him? Will they be afraid? Will they assume he is dangerous?

By the time I got home, I wished so badly that I had handled the entire encounter better. I wish I had been able to calm myself down and talk rationally with that man. I wish I hadn’t let my emotions and my own assumptions take over. I wish I was a better grown up.

I briefly considered driving down there to knock on his door and talk to him like a rational human being.

I’ve done it before, I know I’m capable of it.

About five years ago, when his last dog, a large black lab mix, went after my mother-in-law while she was walking, I’d confronted him. I’d knocked on the door and told him what happened and asked him to keep his dog contained. He promised he would. He didn’t.

The dog came after me next, I fended him off with a stick and later drove down there again. I told him that while I didn’t want to, I would report him if the dog was loose again. I never saw the dog again. But I did hear a rumor that one of the teenagers who lived there was expelled from school for selling marijuana.

It was quiet down there for several years, until the little bulldog puppy appeared on the chain.

And here I am again.

I’m not sure I’m enough of a grown up to do it, but here’s what I would say to him if I had the chance:

I’m sorry I yelled at you. I was frightened for myself and for my dog.

I was also frightened for your dog. I was frightened for the life he leads and what will become of him.

I know you love your dog. I know you don’t believe your dog would hurt anyone, but your dog is an animal. This is his home and you are his people. To him, my dog and I are a threat. He’s only doing his job.

A wise vet once told me, “I don’t care how well you know him. An animal in pain or an animal that is afraid, is not your friend.”

If your dog is scared, you have no idea what he will do, please don’t tell me that you do.

Your dog is a pitbull mix, and through no fault of his own, that makes him a target for fear and misunderstanding. Fairly, or not, managing him badly could land him in the SPCA alongside the other several dozen pitbulls whose owners have not lived up to the affection they profess. It could also lead to his death.

You mentioned the ‘nasty collar’ I had on my dog. It’s called a prong collar. She was not wearing it because she is dangerous, she was wearing it because I’m teaching her not to pull on a leash and not to jump up on people when she’s excited. I want to be sure I can control her when I take her in public spaces.

I know you believe that your dog is secure, tied up on the side of your yard on a sturdy chain, but if you paid more attention to your dog, you would have realized long before today that his wire was close to snapping. I suppose it’s good that it was me and not a car that he was chasing today.

Because he’s a pit, I’m certain your dog is intelligent. He needs more stimulation and exercise than he can get chained up in your yard all alone. Take him for a walk or build him a fence so he can run freely (but make it high because pits are athletic).

You are responsible for this dog. You need to be sure he is safe, but more than that, you need to give him the life he deserves. If he’s harmless and loves people and other dogs, like you say, then take him to the new dog park, walk him on the rail trail, introduce him to dog friends or adopt him a buddy.

 If you love this dog, act like it.

And by the way, I’m not from Baltimore, not that it matters or is any of your business.

Sincerely,

 Your neighbor who only wants to run quietly down our road and not have to fight for her or her dog’s life.

Thanks for reading! If you’d like to know more about my blogs and books, visit CaraWrites.com or subscribe to my monthly e-newsletter.

If you’d like to know how you can volunteer, foster, adopt or donate with OPH, click here. And if you’d like more regular updates of foster dogs past and present, be sure to join the Another Good Dog facebook group.

I love hearing from readers, so please feel free to comment here on the blog, email carasueachterberg@gmail.com or connect with me on Facebook, twitter, or Instagram.

Blessings,

Cara

 

27657711_10155328100897405_3078357021161893116_n
Frankie is getting a little bit too big to lay in Gala’s lap these days.

IMG_3492

 

17 thoughts on “Open Letter to My Pitbull-Owning Neighbor”

  1. Well, first of all, Frankie is growing up fast and that other male pit will not take kindly to him once he’s out running with you. This is such a difficult situation. So many people should not have dogs and yet, here you are. I doubt the man will ever take proper care of his dog no matter what you say or do. I understand. Sorry that happened.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Perhaps you could mail this to him instead of seeing him face to face. You have a wonderful way with words (waiting patiently for your newest book). However, words spoken or written may not change his mind.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. When I first moved here, one of my neighbors had a malamute he kept on a short chain in his yard. It was unbearable to me, but live and let live. Sometimes I saw them running together and the dog seemed happy. Then he got a puppy — pit/husky mix (he says) I think Pit/Akita. He chained the puppy — a small puppy –in his yard (all weather, that includes -20) all the time. I couldn’t handle it. I wrote an ordinance against inhumane tethering and went to the City Council. They viewed me as someone who’d just moved from Baltimore (ha ha) and didn’t pay attention — but the mayor and one councilmember did.

    I intentionally wrote my ordinance to be very complicated. I based it on the laws in other cities, but all I wanted was a law against inhumane tethering with the goal of cops being able to enforce the law and educate dog owners. I know out here tethering is sometimes the only solution. How do you fence 200 acres?

    So I had a meeting with the “good old boys” — city manager, atty, chief of police. None of them had read what I wrote or listend to my presentation. I walked in and the fucking asshole dumbshit (sorry) city manager said, “So you want to abolish dog tethering?” I said, “No. That’s not practical. I just want to see a law against inhumane tethering.” That I had defined as short tethers, tethers where the dog could hang himself, tethers where the dog could break free.”

    Why? Because my neighbor’s dog had grown up enough to break his tether and he came to MY house. He wanted — badly — to be my dog. I had to call animal control and I visited him at the shelter. He could not get close enough to me. Big, heavy, scary, loving dog that I wished I could have kept, but I will never inflict a male dog on Dusty.

    Once when I was walking my dogs, he broke free and it was terrifying. Dusty is very very protective and he would fight a dog. Bullet (the name the shelter gave my neighbor’s dog) wouldn’t fight, but I had three dogs on leashes and this uproarious puppy was endangering me. I was pulled to the ground, screaming “Go home!” NO ONE came out to help me.

    Long story but ultimately the ordinance was passed. The local vet paid to build a dog run for the dog. The owner was laid off and spent all his free time with the dog, hours and hours walking together. I think the noise I made helped the dog. It helped that animal control had been called three times and the shelter had housed Bullet twice. The neighbor did not want to lose his dog. And the neighbor. He’s a sweet man operating with an incomplete combination plate and a sad past.

    Many are the stories of the rural village… ❤ I'm so so sorry you went through this with poor Gala. She didn't need that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m encouraged that your story had a happy ending. Rural dog ownership is so much different than urban or suburban dog ownership, isn’t it? Frustrating. PA has a tethering law, but since this guy (as far as I know) brings the dog in at night and the dog has a tree for shade, he isn’t violating it.

      I worry for that poor pup’s mind and spirit, though. I’m thinking I might take a toy or two for him and leave it under his tree or toss it to him if he’s out there. I don’t know if the guy will see my gift as meddling or judgmental, but I’m not sure I can have any influence on him either way.

      And you’re absolutely right, Gala did NOT need that. She’s already terrified of strange dogs and that episode just reinforced it.

      Someday I’ll move out of this hollow. I know there will be idiots anywhere, but I’ve had about enough of my particular set of idiots.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Often, even though you may not see the results yourself, kindness has effects. So whether you talk to him or send him a letter just being willing to talk about things can have an impact. If you become “real” to him not just some lady with a dog maybe he might hear what you have to say…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Wow, I am so sorry you had to experience that! As someone who lives in a rural area as well, I know how it feels; I have had more than one situation with loose dogs, it can be so scary! I too, feel so sorry for all the dogs, most of which are kept chained 24/7, they go crazy for want of attention and exercise, I just will never understand why anyone would own a dog if all they are going to do is chain it up outside and ignore it. Just remember, while you may have reacted in a way you aren’t proud of now, think of what happened as a good learning experience, even the worst circumstances generally teach us something important.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! I am still rethinking the whole experience, promising myself if given the opportunity, next time I will take a breath and I will put the dogs first and not my fears/emotions. I agree, though, I don’t understand why anyone would leave a dog chained up like that – it makes no sense. I suppose the dog is a security system, but it’s unfair. I’m going to try to take him a toy or two when I finally get up the nerve to run that direction again!

      Like

  6. As a huge fan of Pibble dogs, I am constantly amazed by some of their owners who have no clue what they’re doing to others or their dog. Loyal and athletic they have garnered a bad rap and I would probably prefer to face one of them over a Chihuahua who in my experience generally suffers from bad case of Napoleon complex. That said, ANY dog running toward another who is leashed generally feels threatened. Period. Maybe a note written to your neighbor rather than an in-person confrontation might work. DADOs (dog a$$ dog owners) have a corner on the market when it comes to stupid, no matter where they live. In my books running isn’t all that enjoyable anyway, there’s no need to make it worse with an unruly dog or his DADO. Best of luck.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree – I’d take a pittie (pibble!! love that) over a chihuahua any day. Still mulling it over. I’m pretty sure that guy was well into his last quarter-century and can’t imagine anything I say will change him. Thanks for reading and caring!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m a staunch advocate for pets and decry any DADO that jeopardizes them. You’re probably right on with your assessment that nothing you say will change his behavior. I’d suggest a squirt gun of lemon juice. Won’t hurt the dog, but they generally don’t like the taste and usually turn away. Plus it’s easy to carry when you’re running. 🤩

        Liked by 1 person

  7. For some reason this story was not sent to me. I too was terrorized by two Labrador dogs, one male and one female who had just given birth to puppies. They surrounded my dog who was leashed, they were unleashed with no human. They weren’t going to hurt me they were going to hurt my dog who was terrified too! Thankfully somebody stopped the car and helped me. But my point, send the letter. At least he will know how you felt, it’s not about changing him but sharing part of you with a gruff old guy that obviously has had a gruff old life. He obviously isn’t a good listener but maybe his reading skills are better! 😃

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Your experience must have been really scary – so glad someone stopped to help. My nephew was attacked by loose dogs once and would have been killed if a car hadnt’ stopped to help. He still spent time in the hospital and plenty of stitches.

      Like

  8. Just reread this post, several months after I originally found it. With the prong collar, when you want to get a dog back in line if it’s doing something it shouldn’t, does just tugging on the collar on its neck help to do that? You mentioned here that you were trying back then to teach Gala to behave with people when out in public, and obviously that would’ve meant correcting her when she didn’t. Glad the prong collar helped her. Hopefully your runs since this experience have been free of wayward, harmful nearby dogs.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s