Confessions of a Terrible Foster Mom

Okay, I don’t really think I’m a terrible foster mom.

But I want to share the mishaps/mistakes that I made in this last week fostering. Basically, to show you that we are all learning as we go and that no matter how long you’ve been doing this, you still mess up.

And that’s okay.

My worst day saving dogs is better than someone else’s best day wishing they could save them.

The ABC pups have, in all reality, been a dream. They’ve been easy foster pups (compared to most). They arrived a little over three weeks ago, worm-riddled and, like most foster pups, confused.

While it took two weeks and three types of dewormers, I finally rid them of worms. In just three days, though, they were using puppy pads consistently, sitting for pets and treats, and sleeping in their crate at night.

They’ve never been whiney or yappy, so it’s easy to get my work done in the foster cottage, even take zoom calls, despite them being in the next room. They also get along great, so no breaking up puppy battles all day long (as was the case with at least one other litter this year).

Sounds, great, right? I’m just setting the scene, so you understand all that went wrong had nothing to do with me being overwhelmed by puppies who were demanding. Quite the opposite, I’m going to assume.

I think I just got lazy. They lulled me into a false confidence.

The first hiccup came when Becca scaled the puppy pen fence and spent a night roaming all through the cottage, likely being scolded by Hazel and egged on by her siblings and Diamond.

She didn’t make a big mess or get into anything. She even went back into the puppy room to potty on the puppy pad in the open play area (the other two pups were still closed in their night time pen).

No biggie. I just pulled out the taller puppy pen fence and replaced the section of shorter fence. I use the short one so I can easily climb over the fence when I need to, but now I would use the gate like everyone else.

For extra measure, I had Nick install a baby gate in the doorway to the room. (We have to leave that room open so that the minisplit in there can also heat/cool the kitchen.)

All was well for a few days.

Until this past Saturday when I arrived in the cottage to find mayhem. Hazel was prowling the counters and mewling her displeasure. All three puppies were racing through the cottage, amidst one massive mess.

Somehow, the night before, I had neglected to latch the gate into their sleeping pen. It was shut but not latched. That wouldn’t have been a problem, really, just extra cleaning thanks to the baby gate, except I had also neglected to tell Nick that the baby gate had loosened and it was really easy to bang open if you hit it just right. We could have reconfigured and tightened the gate if I had mentioned it to him. Instead, three excited puppies pouncing on it at once likely made it spring right open.

Commence bedlam.

They found Hazel’s litterbox. Treasure hunting ensued. Thankfully, I had just cleaned it Friday morning so there weren’t a lot of treasures. The puppies must have found it irresistible because the lightweight litter was scattered all over the kitchen and in and around the puppy pen.

The puppies had also found an opened bag of Diamond’s dog food (it wouldn’t all fit in the vittle vault, so I had rolled up the top and left it on the floor beside the counter. That’s not a normal behavior for me. I know better. I should have sealed it with packing tape and put it in the food storage area (the shower in the bathroom). My only excuse is that I planned to do that on Saturday (my cottage cleaning day), which isn’t really an excuse, just pure laziness on full display.

The puppies themselves were pleased as punch and over-the-moon excited to see me. They were also desperately thirsty. I put them in their pen, but didn’t fill their water bowls until I googled ‘what happens to puppies who eat clumping cat litter’.

I imagined the worst – their intestines becoming impacted, three emergency surgeries, thousands of dollars. To my great relief, google told me that dogs normally are fine but to watch them closely just in case the litter binds with the liquid in their tummies and causes an obstruction (it only addressed dogs eating clumping litter, and didn’t say what happens to little puppies – so at the time it wasn’t much relief).

The basic rule was to feed/water them normally so that their systems would just crank it out. Considering they’d probably eaten at least a day’s worth of food, I gave them water but no breakfast. After drinking their fill, the puppies were enormously bloated and commenced pooping. Thankfully, everyone was ultimately fine (after a day of fasting and pooping and drinking a ton).

Still…it’s easy to torture yourself with what if’s. In retrospect, I should have known better, and I usually double-check gates, but these puppies have been so easy, and I was distracted by holiday prep. I want to say something like this will never happen again. I really do.

In February, I will have been fostering for ten years, and I’m sure I’ve left gates open, cat litter available, bags unsecured before. Maybe this time the lesson will stick. (which is probably why I’m confessing it publicly).

But that’s not all, folks! One other tragedy was averted the next day.

Early Sunday morning, I was to drive Becca to her new adopters near Baltimore. (And no, I don’t usually provide this service, but these adopters can’t drive long distances AND I was headed to Wilmington, Delaware to visit a friend in the hospital, so it seemed like something I was meant to do.)

I got up early, heated up the crate/blanket/car and went to grab Becca. The puppies had obviously had a wild night because all three had pulled off their quick-release collars and darted naked around the pen. I scooped up Becca (the puppy who is always sitting nicely for me instead of flinging herself at the fence), put her in the carrier, and off we went.

About three miles from the house, I heard Becca getting sick in the crate. I glanced back at her to see how bad it was and noticed that Becca had one blue eye. Only Becca doesn’t have one blue eye. Cassie does.

I had the wrong puppy.

Fifteen minutes, one U-turn, one cleaned crate, a fresh towel, and the correct puppy, and we were back on the road. It took over two hours to get to the adopter’s house. And I mused the whole time – what if I hadn’t looked back? What if Cassie didn’t have a blue eye? Would I have driven the entire way to Baltimore only to realize I had the wrong puppy?

Woulda-coulda-shouldas. Thank goodness for adoption magic. It has covered my butt a time too many.

In the end, Becca was delivered to her ecstatic adopters who are definitely going to spoil her rotten, and she will be a FAT puppy. (In all the rush, I forgot to get a picture!).

Cassie was picked up by the correct adopters this morning.

And Alex is still here by his little lonesome self. If you know of someone looking for a darling, smart, exceedingly sweet puppy, send them my way.

Click here to learn more about Alex.

What would I have done if I’d arrived with Cassie at the house in Baltimore? I suppose I would have taken Cassie to the hospital with me, which wouldn’t have been all bad. Puppies do make everything better.

Which is to say, I would have sorted it out. And it would have been fine. Because, in the end, that’s what fosters do. We figure it out.

And I’ll do better next time.

I hope what you got from this story isn’t, omg, Cara is an idiot. I hope you thought, ‘Wow, if she can do it, I could foster too.’ AND ‘It’s okay to make mistakes. Even the most experienced foster does. It’s no reason not to foster.’

I hope you will. It would be a great way to start 2025.

(for more information on fostering with OPH, click here. OPH has foster homes in VA, MD, DC, and south central PA).

#fosteringsaveslives

Until Each One Has a Home,

Cara

If you like what you read and want to support my writing, consider buying me a cup of coffee.

For information on my writing and books, visit CaraWrites.com.

My next book, Who Will Let the Dogs Out: Stories and Solutions for Shelters and Rescues will be released January 28, 2025, but you can order an early copy and support our mission to give them to shelters and rescues, by purchasing one directly from Who Will Let the Dogs Out.

If you’d like regular updates of all our foster dogs past and present, plus occasional dog care/training tips, and occasional foster cat updates (!) be sure to join the Facebook group, Another Good Dog.

And if you’d like to know where all these dogs come from and how you can help solve the crisis of too many unwanted dogs in our shelters, visit WhoWillLetTheDogsOut.org and subscribe to our blog where we share stories of our travels to shelters, rescues, and dog pounds.

If you can’t get enough foster dog stories, check out my book: Another Good Dog: One Family and Fifty Foster Dogs. Or its follow up that takes you to the shelters in the south One Hundred Dogs & Counting: One Woman, Ten Thousand Miles, and a Journey Into the Heart of Shelters and Rescues.

I love to hear from readers and dog-hearted people! Email me at carasueachterberg@gmail.com.

If you’d like to support the work we do (and save the rescue and me some money), shop our Amazon wishlist. We are currently in need of chicken and chicken-byproduct-free, high-quality food, puppy treats, large dog beds (or cover replacements any size – we can cut the memory foam pieces I have to fit).

If you’d like to take a vacation with your whole pack, consider visiting one of our two dog-WELCOMING vacation rentals. Visits BringDogs.com to learn more.